We’re All Hung Over
I have a theory about how life feels for so many of us these days. I see people who have grown all kinds of electronic appendages to their bodies—cell phones, PDAs, iPods, etc. They can’t bear to be away from their gadgets. (I thought technology was supposed to make our lives easier?) “What if I miss something important?” is the general sentiment. Guess what? You are missing something important right now. It’s called “your life!”
As a result of all of this 24/7 access, information overload, and constant stimulation, so many of us feel “hung over” these days. I don’t mean that we drank too much tequila last night (at least I don’t remember drinking that much tequila last night)! What I mean by “hung over” is that we’re OVERworked, OVERstructured, OVERloaded, OVERinformed, OVERstimulated, and OVERwhelmed. Too many of us feel this way. By continuing this mode of operation, we get to keep lots of data and information in our brains and be up-to-the-minute on all news and events, but there is a tremendous cost to living this way: burnout.
Fried, frazzled, irritable, and fatigued. All that information intake, all that meeting of deadlines and timelines and schedules and appointments, and you may just find one day you can’t do it anymore. Or maybe the opposite—you won’t have the energy needed to do anything about it. You may keep pushing through and find that your physical and mental health really start to suffer. Believe me, I understand the importance of meeting family and work responsibilities, but you also need to recognize when it’s all too much or you’ve gotten off course from the life you really want to live.
The truth is, burning out isn’t going to serve you, your family, your clients, or anyone. What we want is to get you living the kind of life that feeds you rather than depletes you.
Where Do You Start? My Story
I was in a rut myself for many years. Prior to becoming a coach, I was unsatisfied with much of the work I was doing for most of my career. Days weren’t all horrible—I had plenty of good days too. But they just didn’t provide the meaning that I was craving.
My biggest problem was that I had no vision for my life. I didn’t know where I wanted to go or even how to begin. So I did what most of us do . . . nothing. But then time started melting away—days became months, which soon added up to years. Back then, I worked in New York City and lived in Connecticut. I was commuting two hours each way to work (four hours in total each day), and I hated that I didn’t have any time to spend with my wife and one-year-old daughter. This was not the husband or dad I wanted to be. But as the sole breadwinner of the family at the time, I couldn’t simply stop working. Although I didn’t know what to do, I realized that I had to at least stop “losing” days.
Then, one beautiful afternoon, I was having lunch outside, reflecting on my situation and feeling very stuck. Have you ever felt that way, like you’re running in place and you know you want things to change but you don’t know what to do about it?
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