Moving Toward, Against, and Away from Other People
Building on distinctions drawn by the noted psychoanalyst, Karen Horney, Riso and Hudson (2003, p. 187) identify three clusters related to three specific anticipations about interpersonal relationships.
“A second, and usually more useful, way to analyze your scores is to add them according to what we call the “Hornevian Groups.” In Personality Types we noted that the psychiatrist Karen Horney’s aggressive types, or those who “move against people,” correspond to the Enneagram assertive types Three, Seven, and Eight. Her compliant types, or those who “move toward people,” correspond to the Enneagram dutiful types One, Two, and Six; and her withdrawn types, or those who “move away from people,” correspond to withdrawn types Four, Five, and Nine.”
The three Horney-based clusters closely relate to the three-fold cluster of interpersonal feelings. When feelings of anger are dominant, a movement against other people is prevalent. The movement away from other people prevails when feelings of fear are dominant. The movement toward other people is manifest in an interesting way when feelings of shame are prominent. Specifically, the anticipation of another person being the source of or at least associated with our fear will lead us to move away from them. We “fear” that the other person or group of people is stronger, quicker, and more active than we are. So, we had best stay away from them. The polarization that is tragically common in our present society is aligned with this dominance of a fear factor. One might ask if Enneagram Fours, Fives, and Nines are particularly adaptive in mid-21st-century societies, given the predominance of assertive and dominating leadership styles (Enneagram Eights?). It might be good “survival” tactics to go deep inside one’s psyche (Fours), or remain outside the fray (Fives), or spend time trying to buffer the blow of the assertive “bullies” (Nines).
When we consider the internal world in which an anger-based psychosocial template “rules the roost,” then it is to be expected that the Enneagram Three, Seven, and Eight see their external world as one in which assertive behavior is appropriate. We need to push against other people if we want to get anything done (Threes), if we want to realize our dreams (Sevens), or if we want to be sure that we are in charge and have control of things (Eights). Our mid-21st-century world might be conducive to these motives given the threat inherent in conditions of volatility, uncertainty, complexity, ambiguity, turbulence, and contradiction (VUCA-Plus) (Bergquist, 2025). Thus, those who are responsible for addressing VUCA-Plus challenges might be included to “push against other people,” while those who are impacted by these aggressive leaders might be included to “move away from other people [and the aggressive people in particular].”
As I have mentioned, the relationship between the feeling of shame and the predilection to “move toward other people” is interesting and a bit nuanced. When we feel shame regarding our own behavior or the indictment of our behavior offered by other people, it might be tempting initially to move away from other people and go into hiding. Yet, shame is a feeling that often can only be assuaged by understanding, appreciation, support, and (yes) loving relationships with other important people in our life.
When we anticipate love expressed by other people, then there is a renewed (or new) possibility that we can begin to love or at least forgive ourself. We are told that what we did is “alright” or “understandable” given the circumstances. This appreciation articulated by another person enables us to reframe, re-interpret, and re-appraise our own actions. Our psychosocial template is not filled with acceptance, appreciation, and support. We can “go bravely into our new world” without a sense of personal shame and worthlessness. This appreciative psychosocial template might be even more appropriate than a template that leads us to retreat in a mid-21st-century world that is filled with VUCA-Plus challenges (Bergquist, 2025).
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