For the Enneagram Three, physiological and psychological “burnout” often follows repeated confrontations with lions and repeated attempts to freeze when being confronted by lions. Even when the Enneagram Three is occasionally successful, like Tarzan, in defeating the lion, the anticipation of new battles and new defeats produces inappropriate, sustained, and destructive sympathetic responses in their bodies. Type A stress, high blood pressure, and heart attacks often accompany the Enneagram Three’s anticipation of lions, especially if this anticipation is negative.
Enneagram Four: The Tragic Romantic
If Enneagram Three might best be portrayed in a movie by a hard-hitting action filled story of Wall Street, the production of a new-fangled automobile, or the Horatio-Alger type life story of a person who rose from poverty to great wealth and success, the Enneagram Four movie is likely to involved deep tragedy and intense love, with a Bronte-like script shot on the moors of England. Helen Palmer (Palmer, 1991, p. 168) offers her own summary of this fourth type:
“Fours remember abandonment in childhood, and as a result they suffer from a sense of deprivation and loss. Their inner situation is reflected in the literary prototype of the tragic romantic who, having attained recognition and material success, remains steadfastly focused upon the lost love, the unavailable love, a future love, and a picture of happiness that only love can bring. To understand this worldview, you need to project yourself into a state of mind where decisions are based as much upon the shifting chemistry of mood as upon the perception of actual facts; and where conversations are remembered as much for their feeling tone and innuendo as for whatever words were actually expressed. Depression is a frequent mood.”
Anticipation for the Enneagram Four inevitably involves the sense that something of emotional importance is about to take place. The Enneagram Four must “brace themselves” for this impending encounter. This often means becoming highly vigilant (complete with a squirt of dopamine). The somatic template is “alive and well” with all senses being fully alert. The Enneagram Four can even smell better (“what perfume are you wearing?”) and be highly sensitive to touch (“Your caress is amazing’). With this “bracing” comes a filtering system in full operation. Those things that are trivial get screened out in favor of those things that are deeply meaningful and moving.
I am reminded of a scene late in the Hollywood version of Lerner and Lowe’s Brigadoon—a musical that is Enneagram Four-saturated. Gene Kelly is sitting at a bar, reminiscing about his loving encounter with Cyd Charisse in a mythic Scottish village. His fiancée is talking to him about their upcoming wedding and Gene’s lack of attention to her. Gene doesn’t hear her (and is inattentive as his fiancée observes). The bar is humming with many conversations, yet all that Gene can hear are the words and songs sung by himself and Cyd in Brigadoon. That which holds little emotional meaning simply receives very little attention. Anticipation is directed to that which is likely to hold great meaning.
For the Enneagram Four, positive anticipation requires two features. First, there must be engagement in a deeply emotional and personally insightful experience or relationship. Brigadoon will gain attention long before plans for a wedding (that never takes place). The second feature is the nature of this experience or relationship. It has to be pleasantly powerful. Cyd Charisse fills the bill. Gene’s fiancé does not. For the Enneagram Four, the anticipation of a pleasant experience or relationship can also be tinted with a bit of remorse. This makes the experience or relationship much more meaningful. Cyd Charisse is enticing not only because of her beauty and grace (as a great dancer), but also because Gene can’t be with her. That which is desirable but unavailable is most enticing for the Enneagram Four. I point again to the unrequited romances on the English moors.
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