Helping our Clients Reframe Their Circumstances

Once we were able to move away from the list, and explore his relation to the list, he was able to identify ways to help himself and his team gain skills to better prioritize and respond to their changing environment.  It was less about the weight of the problems in front of them and more about the opportunities those problems were presenting.  He also realized that he did not need to sacrifice his honeymoon to solve these issues himself, rather he could ask helpful questions of his team to lift them to their best thinking.

There are many ways for us to help clients reframe their circumstances, but it is reliant on our coaching presence and how we are showing up in the moment. Here are some questions we can ask ourselves to understand our own presence:

What do I really believe about the capabilities of the person in front of me? Do I honestly believe that they are whole resourceful and creative, or is my impetus to help them fix issues?

What am I aware of in myself that might add to or interfere with the coaching process? Do I have a history of success in a specific area that I rely on in my coaching, rather than just being present to the client’s needs?

What are my own ego impulses and character structures, and how might they interfere with coaching presence? For example, I am an Enneagram 2, The Helper.  How are my impulses to be liked for helping people getting in the way of the client’s own wisdom?

Am I truly present with the client, or am I listening simply to figure out the best next question?

Sometimes what is needed is a simple reframing of our circumstances.  The same goes for us as coaches.  The quality of life is not determined by the circumstances…it is determined by our presence!