O² Regrets
At the other end of the polarity (O²/Quest), we find the regret that come with living in the midst of challenge and uncertainty. We walk by a home on our way back to the hotel. We view the fireplace ablaze in this home’s living room. We imagine the life of this home’s family. We wonder why there is no fireplace in our near future. We sit in a city park for several minutes in order to observe children playing on some nearby swings. We reflect on the last time we spent time with our own children in a playground. They have now grown older and no longer spend much time at the park.
In the back of my head comes Harry Chapin’s song (Cats in the Cradle) concerning the father who never spends time with his son—and finds that is son is becoming “just like his father.” This song is filled with regret and the message contained in its lyrics pulls at our fatherly (or motherly) heartstrings. Why did I take this consulting assignment or agree to do a fair amount of work “out-of-town.” Here I am in an Asian (or European) city and am a long, long way from home. Filled with regret, we often begin to both envy and hate those people who live in the home with the fireplace or those who are playing with their children.
Chart Two: Fear, Loss and Regret
At the heart of the matter regarding the themes found in Chart Two is the psychological basis to be found in each of these themes. While there are both internal and external factors to consider when framing the positive features related to Trust, the negative features tend to reside in our heart and head. Fear, Loss and Regret play out inside us in response to conditions that often present themselves from outside us.
Polarity Parameters
Having identified the key actors in this drama of polarized trust, I am now ready to introduce three of the key parameters that operate in all polarities. Two of these are emphasized by Barry Johnson (1992/1996). The third parameter is one that I would introduce in the preparation of a polarity-based analysis.
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