I’ve become more modest. When I was very young, I looked for the spotlight and attention that came from having a leadership role. As I have grown older, I have gained the ability to deflect the spotlight and attention from myself onto others.
I have learned to reserve judgment and not be quick in making decisions based on the first thing that comes to my mind. I now take time to gather adequate information. I don’t like people who come in and waste my time, but sometimes it is necessary to allow certain staff members to do that because it is valuable for them to express personal concerns or views. This helps build a relationship with that person, whether I agree with that person or not.
Emerging sages say they are now less likely to abdicate leadership due to fear of conflict. They realize that a leader’s emotions set the tone for the entire office. At the heart of the matter is their increased able to define and set boundaries:
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I used to be introverted, goal-oriented, and focused on just getting the job done. Now, I am not just focused on the end result. I take time to step back and look at the process. I have learned to be more extroverted and have focused on developing my interpersonal skills, moving towards more of a participative style.
I used to be a lot more afraid of conflict. So much so that I abdicated some leadership responsibility because I was not willing to have conversations or deal with things that were unpleasant. It is now comfortable for me to have direct conversations with people younger than me, but those who are older is still more challenging. One thing I’ve worked on changing is the dynamics between myself and my staff. I’m trying to define those relationships and set better boundaries and clearer expectations. This requires being more of a leader rather than a friend or colleague.