As water always finds a way, so will leaders who get grounded, breathe, and then face challenges with a calm, clear, curious and compassionate head and heart[9]. Those who depend upon you during difficult times tend to defer and trust that their leader will honor the common mission and secure the survival of as many as possible. Put your oxygen mask on first, then ride the rough waters to shore.
Fire: Capture and Use the Heat of the Moment
John O’Leary, author of On Fire,[10] tells his story about being burned on 100 percent of his body as a nine year-old child. He nearly died, spent 13 months in recovery, lost fingers, and lives with the scars. He was asked, if he had the choice would he do it again? He answered “yes.” He found his purpose by struggling, bouncing back, growing, and emerging stronger. He became a hospital chaplain, an author, and motivational speaker.
A resilient leader develops the ability to take advantage of the heat of the moment, the emotional power underlying our drive to survive and thrive. John O’Leary explains that the difference between being the victim and being the victor rests on one question: “Why me?” The victim of hardship feels beaten down by adversity, burdened by misfortune and despair: Why me? Why do I have to struggle? What did I do to deserve this? I can’t do this. In contrast, the victor transforms challenge into opportunity and asks, “Why me?” What lessons does this situation hold? How can I turn this experience into a benefit for me and my team? There is a reason why this is happening to me; what am I being called to do? Leaders who develop the ability in the face of a high-stakes challenge to notice, pause, get grounded, breathe and regulate their emotions can tap into that drive to survive, and flow strategically through the difficulty, while empowering others to join in. Resilient leaders face adversity as a call to action to give what only they can give in that moment of their life.
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