Home Concepts Managing Stress & Challenges When You Can’t Choose Your Divorce, You Can Choose Your Attitude

When You Can’t Choose Your Divorce, You Can Choose Your Attitude

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Remember the mind and body connection. What we do or don’t do with our bodies is directly correlated to how we feel. 7-8 hours sleep per night, eat well, and try to get try to get moderate exercise, especially outdoor time. Sunshine is a great healer.

Develop a sense of spirituality. Studies show that people who acknowledge a higher power are happier than those who don’t. Organized religion, being in nature, praying, meditating, music and reading scripture can all be ways of cultivating our spirituality.

Learn how to reframe. Reframing is at the heart of resilience. It means looking at something from a different perspective. We do this by asking better questions. When dealing with pain, ask questions such as “What else can this mean” or “What’s perfect about this?” These questions will elicit healthier responses and outcomes vs. “Why me?” or “Why am I cursed?”

Having to deal with a challenge like divorce or, on a smaller scale, a tough 10 mile road race, is painful. However, with the right attitude, these experiences can teach valuable life lessons. Change is a growth opportunity. Sometimes we change because we have to. Tony Robbins says that people change more readily when the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of changing. “I have to change” is more powerful than “I want to change.” In my own life, while going through divorce, I changed because I had to. It was too painful to go back and too painful to stay the same. But, now, I am happier, stronger, and more resilient.

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