Finding Essence in a VUCA-Plus World IV: Trust, Optimization and Polarity Management

We must pay attention to the alarms—for they uncover and signal underlying fears that we must not ignore. When we are anxious, when there is a lingering sense of overwhelm, and when we feel like our world is not being safely contained, then there is a strong temptation to misuse medications, imbibe in too many Martinis, or spend too much time betting on sports teams. We might find that our temporary “High” from an exciting project is overtaken by a bout of fatigue, sleeplessness and even depression.

We feel overwhelmed. This feeling often results in a short-term “bout of the blues” (temporary/situational depression). However, excessive O² can also serve to cloche chronic (clinical) depression or serve as a vehicle for the manic phase of a bi-polar mental illness. Even without the dramatic appearance of depression, the overstay and overreliance on O² (Quest) can leave us feeling empty and lost in a world that yields no meaning or purpose for us. It provides only a temporary “High”. The alarms are ringing. We must make some adjustments in our life.

Table Three: O² Alarm Signals: Fear

As we did with S², the alarm signals regarding O² can be expanded beyond the domain of fear. Important O² signals can be identified that relate to loss and regret. First, there is the profound but often elusive sense that one’s integrity has been lost. We become “expedient.” Discovering an abundance of opportunity, we are inclined to become “opportunistic.” We grab the “low hanging fruit” and do not consider whether or not this fruit is good for us or for the community we are serving. Ken Gergen (1991/2000) writes about the multiple opportunities that saturate our sense of self.  We suffer from multiphrenia (rather than schizophrenia) with many identities swirling around our head and heart.

When we pause for a moment to consider this loss of any guiding values and priorities—and ultimately the loss of a unified, integrated sense of self—there is often an attendant sense of Guilt: “My God, what has happened to me!” “Will I do anything to make a buck or score a point at work?” “Where was the point that I forgot obligations to my spouse and children?” These guilt-ridden questions serve as important alarms. If they are ignored, then we are likely to experience regret at a later point in our life. I am reminded of Harry Chapin’s “Cat’s in the Cradle” where regret is expressed regarding lack of quality time spent with one’s son.

Reget is also likely to serve in several other ways as an alarm. We can regret the ongoing desire to always remain on the quest. Satisfaction is always one step ahead of us. In an interview I conducted several years ago with mature students in an M.A. program, I inquired about the amount of money they “should” be making in their current job. One of the students replied: “One dollar more than I am now making . . . “ I then asked: “how do you know if you have been successful?” The answer: “when I make this one additional buck!”