I would suggest another powerful interpersonal relations tool that was first provided by George Kelly (1991, 2015) in his two volumes on the psychology of personal constructs. Called the Role Construct Test (later called the Repertoire Grid), a respondent is asked to determine how several important people in their life are alike and different from one another. By looking at the clustering of people with similar and with different attributes, Kelly was able to identify specific personal constructs (or schemas) that helped to guide one’s relationship with other people. In many ways, Kelly was offered a paper-and-pencil based “factor analysis” of the way in which we categorize and (based on this categorization) relate to and work with other people in our life.
I would suggest that a similar analysis could be done in determining the roles that other people play as sources of support. Having identified a list of 10 to 15 people who provide us with support, we can (like Kelly) identify how they are similar to and different from one another. With this analysis in place, we can construct our own personal list of support categories—and determine how they are similar to or different from the lists I have offered and Waldinger and Schulz have offered. If we find that our list does not include all of those on the two lists offered in this essay, then it might be time to look for differing kinds of support from other people in our life. Perhaps we need to find a fun-loving friend during stressful periods. Or we might look for the gentle challenger or someone who helps us gain a better sense of who we are and what we should be doing (perhaps in counter the challenging conditions of VUCA-Plus).
A professional coach can be of valuable assistance in not only helping us identify sources of support, but also in the analysis of the nature of support that is available (perhaps helping with a Kelly Role Construct analysis). It is critical that a coach serve this function when they are about to close out the coaching engagement. They should leave the client with support resources having been identified and analyzed at the end of the coaching assignment—especially if they have been the primary source of support for their client.
Incremental Change: Change should be planned from a long-term, wide-range perspective, rather than from a short-range or piecemeal point of view. In planning for change, however, it is often essential that the desired change be broken up into small, manageable units that have short-term and rather modest goals. A series of small change curves is usually preferable to a single large one. Furthermore, if a series of small change projects are identified, it is possible to initiate a second project when the first encounters significant resistance. Small projects can also be sequenced in a way that will meet current needs and concerns, while also being responsive over the long run to more basic and far-reaching problems.
Diffusion of Interests and Activities: If any one change absorbs all or most of a person’s or organization’s attention, then this transition is likely to be stressful, for the person or organization has no other interest or activity that can provide stability or variety. In preparation for a transition, one should ensure that other areas of interest in one’s life do not get set aside during the change process. Given the tendency of many people who are experiencing stressful transitions to focus intensely on the change, it is essential that other roles, goals and activities be reinforced as salient features of the person’s or organization’s life.
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