Complicated Retirement: The world of retirement has grown a bit more complicated in recent years, and the transition between work and retirement has become more confusing for many men and women; there are several reasons. First, mid-centurions do not necessarily retire at 65. In a previous essay in this series, we identify multiple options to retirement (Quehl and Bergquist, 2023) Second, some mid-centurions want to make the transition in life and career earlier than age 65. In either case, the question is: what we do about the second moratorium and how does this potential identity exploration relate to the engagement of Generativity Three and Four roles?
Assume for a moment that we want to make a change prior to age 65 or 70. We are not ready for formal retirement, yet we want to make a change. At the other end of the decision-making spectrum, we find men and women who don’t want to or can’t retire by age 70. Even though our inner voices suggest that we shift our priorities and attend to other matters, we still have to work, perhaps even into our late Seventies. If we are in our 50’s or early 60’s, our society expects us to continue being active “breadwinners.” If we are in our late 60’s or early 70’s, we don’t have enough money saved for retirement. In either case, we face quite a dilemma. Do we have time for generative activities during our 50s, 60s or 70s? Or do we still have to be “working stiffs” who have no time for deep caring outside our immediate family?
As we noted in our previous essay (Quehl and Bergquist, 2023), we have multiple options, whether we are in our 50s and early 60s or our late 60s and early 70s. Some of us choose the most obvious of these options. We retire after planning carefully for what we will do when we are no longer working for pay. As part of the planning, we will often consider volunteer work that satisfies Generativity Three or Generativity Four motives. There is a second option. We negotiate a compromise by giving some voices our immediate attention; other voices are deferred until some point later in our life, when society says it is appropriate for us to try something new.
A third option is also available to those who have been financially successful in life or are particularly courageous. These fortunate or brave men and women alter their lifestyle so that they are doing what they really want to do. The traditional distinction drawn between work and retirement begins to break down for the men and women who choose the third option. Their work often becomes their avocation, and their hobby becomes that for which they are paid. At a conference on work and play that the two of us hosted many years ago, we invented the word “plork” to describe the full integration of work and play. Several of the men and women we coach have taken this path. They have left behind their administrative duties and settled into a life of “plork.” They begin the transition to Generativity Three and Four.
Unfortunately, for some who have chosen this third option while still in their 50’s and 60’s, there are societal pressures to move back to a “real job.” Bernice Neugarten’s observations once again come into play. We are “out-of-sync.” Many of our younger “third-option” colleagues indicate during coaching sessions that they feel guilty about not going to work each day while moving toward Generativity Three or Four projects. They provide volunteer services in their community that isn’t “really work.” One of our coaching clients, Brad, spends much of his time serving as a docent and board member at a local museum. He has been wrestling with several fundamental doubts during our coaching sessions. He recently commented:
