included in Appendix A, “Name that Emotion.” At four intervals throughout the day, they are told to stop and write 1. what they are doing and 2. how they are feeling, choosing from the list of 80 words. Most struggle with the exercise at first. They dislike the number of choices and can’t differentiate one type of happiness, fear or anger from another.
The good news is that after only a few days, the exercise gets easier. Participants begin to identify subtle distinctions and patterns in their reactions. They can say they feel confused, delighted, frustrated, embarrassed or exhausted without looking at the list. They begin to feel more in control of their emotional states simply by taking the time to check in with themselves.
This awareness is only the first step. Once you become fluent at labeling the emotion you are feeling in any given moment, you can then apply a number of different techniques to shift your emotional state if you choose to. Or you can accept your experience of anger or sadness as a vital expression in your current situation. The power lies in making the conscious choice of how you want to feel and think, which is fully within your power to do.
EXERCISE #1
Before we go any further in this book, I request you begin the inventory, Name that Emotion, by noticing what you are feeling and then writing down the words on the charts of Appendix A. Completing the pages will begin to re-activate your emotional intelligence. As you familiarize yourself with your emotional states, you will better understand their effect on your productivity, confidence and happiness. Then, when you learn more about choice later in the book, you will be freer to choose how you want to feel and to act in all circumstances.
HEAD GAMES
Earlier this year, I taught a few seminars at a chemical company in Texas. Between classes, I provided coaching for the
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